The Dolphins Make Me Cry.com - Forums

I dunno how or why, but this came to me while i was watching "Football in the Groin" from the Simpsons, on Youtube. This should be pretty interesting.

If there was one person on this earth, that you could kick, beautifully, squarely, in the balls (or the vadge), for your own reasons - who would it be, and why?

I think everyone'll look at this a bit differently, some will go for ex-girlfriends/boyfriends/bosses, some will be sport related, political, or whatever....

Who'd it be?

(*Edited Thread Subject)

Oh man easy, my ex boss Emilio. I wouldn't cross the street to piss on that MF'ER if he were on fire. I'd work my legs out for 2 months straight so I can pull a Morten Anderson on his balls in hopes that it would turn his shit into pure liquid inside that sack. 

I'd probably go back in time and kick myself right before some of the dumber things I've done.

I still have not been able to limit myself down to one person.

^^^^^

Me  either.

That's where I'm at. There are several.

I honestly cannot think of a single individual that I know or have known personally, that I would want to give a swift kick in the nuts.

Not sure what that means...

(I did select "does not hold a grudge" in the super villian thing...)

^^^
Agreed. I just do not hold grudges life's too short for that shit!!!!

The idiot at lunch that just ran a red light, almost hit me and then flipped me off like I did something wrong by going when my light turned green.

Other than that - if someone upsets you to the point where you are that mad at them...you're wasting precious energy.  Let it go, life's too short.

Tommy  ;)

That douche that wears a hoodie on the sidelines at Patriot games.

Everyone who waves a flag and is all for going to war, then sits back and lets others do the fighting.

Had to bring up names eh?  You know I wanna do a lot more to you than just kick you in the balls.   

Sounds kinky  :o

Any random Cowboys fan I might run into while walking down the street...

There was this one asshole at the Hard Rock Casino that didn't want to play cards while we played.  So, he sat out until we were done.

That guy.

Nick Saban?

You're right. Saban deserves it way more than Tommy.

If he wins today and has to go to Miami for the national championship, it very well may happen.

I just feel like a Kick in the Balls is a chicken shit move...I'm more of a knock yo ass out type .....

Same here.

Fine. I'll stomp on his balls after I knock him on his ass.

^^ that'll work too... :D

I finally found the one person, and there is a bit of a story to it. I had a friend who had been battling leukemia for about three years. The past year was a bad one with more time in the hospital than out. I went to her funeral yesterday. After the funeral I found out that her ex-husband's girlfriend told my friend's daughter "Your Mom is going to die soon so you should start calling me Mom."

Wow is that messed up.

Everyone on this board should be lining up for a shot.

Tony Kornheiser.

Good one...I hate that guy

He set a new record last Monday by waiting at least five minutes to say something weak that pissed me off.  At least Dennis Miller was somewhat funny.  They should replace Kornheiser with Michael Wilbon.

Also, I wish Jim Everett would have done that super sac kick Thundergod was talking about to Jim Rome.  Good stuff, Thunder.  Good stuff.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HNgqQVHI_8

I like Kornheiser.  He doesn't bring much to the booth, but I watch his show and I enjoy his personality.

I like Tony too. But then again,  I liked Dennis as well.  I also like having Joe Rose in the booth for  the  Dolphins too because you never know what he is going to say. He keeps it from getting too stiff!

PTI is fine but not MNF.  I guess I'm not much for his personality--too pussified and all he does is talk about QBs and how horrible they are.  I haven't really made it through a full game because of it. 

Also on the list for a snap kick to the bits is the jerky bastard from Pittsburgh I see on NFL Network way too much.  Mark Madden is from ESPN Radio 1250.

I liked Dennis Miller on TV, but in the booth, it felt like he was trying to hard.  They brought a comedian in and it really felt like it.  He was always looking to say some weird analogy and everything felt pre-planned, like he'd come up with a routine before the show.

Tony K is a little bit like that, but at least I feel like he's got the background in sports.

Background is sports but doesn't seem to be a football guy.  Miller talked too much and went out on a limb too often like you said.  Maybe I should watch an entire game before I'm too harsh on Tony.  It's hard to look at the guy in HD though...looks like somebody dipped him in a cotton candy vat with that hairdo.   

The thing I like best about Kornheiser is that he challenges the guys in the booth when they say stupid crap.  Wasn't he in the booth with Theisman for a while, and always made him clarify his ridiculous statements?  (Or am I thinking of someone else?)

He may TRY to do that from time to time...but the shit that comes out of Tony Kornholer's mouth is usually 5 times as stupid and he does it about 5 times more often than Jaws (who he usually tries to call out) and the other guy.

Anyone catch the mess where Tony said, "Jeff Garcia likes to date hot quarterbacks..." last MNF TB vs Carolina?  Got it on Tivo.  Freudian slip.


Paul McGuire.

Anyone on the Patsies roster, and Losman for fumbling the game away to the Jets.

NFL Comish Rodger Goodell after he levies his next fine for contact in what is supposed to be a contact sport and God Forbid speaking your mind.