The Dolphins Make Me Cry.com - Forums

Here's what I think should happen: (Team / Current Coach / Replacement / Comments)

Cleveland - Romeo Crennel - Marty Schottenheimer
Romeo Crennel's era is over in Cleveland, thankfully. He is a bum, and it's unfortunate because he is a Parcells descendant. Marty ball returns to Cleveland, which means a couple of Wild Card playoff appearances without doing much.

Detroit - Rod Marinelli - Dennis Green
Hey, why not? His old QB is now out of retirement, and he has an explosive receiver to work with in Calvin Johnson. Plus, I want another "They are who we thought they were" quote sometime during his tenure. But hey, Rod Marinelli is a complete joke and has got to be released.

Cincinnati - Marvin Lewis - Jim Mora Sr.
I am actually serious about this one. Jim Mora, while a doof, will actually make this team go at least .500 and have a halfway decent offense out there. Anything is better than that clown Marvin Lewis, who I think is the most over-rated bum of a head coach ever. Chad Johnson runs his team. Enough said. Bring back Jim Mora Sr.

Kansas City - Herm Edwards - Pepper Johnson
It's about time Pepper Johnson gets a try at an NFL franchise. He's been the Patriots LB coach for a million years, and I really like him (and he's a former Giants LB). Replace Herm Edwards, who really hasn't done anything with what used to be a very potent offense in KC, but has since gone to shit because of Edwards)

San Diego - Norv Turner - Bobby Ross
Whatever ever happened to the good old days of Bobby Ross in the mid-90's? The defense was good and the offense did it's part, and hey, they made it to a Super Bowl (beating the Steelers on the Road and the Dolphins at home on that wild game - very impressive). He would be much better than Norv Turner, a complete tool of a head coach that CONTINUES to get HC jobs in the NFL for some strange reason.

Chicago - Lovie Smith - Bill Cowher
This is the one that you did not see coming. Lovie Smith, unfortunately, is highly mediocre, despite going to a Super Bowl. His team under-achieves every single season, despite loads of defensive talent. Bill Cowher is an awesome fit here - tough, hard-nosed, blue-collar city with a tough defense and passionate fans. Perfect for a guy like him.

Seattle - Mike Holmgren - Someone else other than Jim Mora Jr.!!!
Holmgren is retiring, but should he? Jim Mora Jr. BLOWS GOATS. God, he is outlandishly horrible. Can't they find someone else there other than him? Any coach at all? How did a staple of the NFC fall so far, so fast? For the good of the division, please don't let Jim Mora Jr. get this job.

Uhh ... Rams?

I think Mike Singletary will be given the HC job for San Fran.

Al Davis sees the Singletary situation, and a light bulb goes off in his head. He then calls William Perry to be the head coach. Perry accepts and is the new head coach of the Raiders.

Well unfortunately you will be stuck with Jim Haslett for a few years there in STL. He is very mediocre as well, but that's much better than what the Rams have, or, what they can get. They could gamble and go college (that fat-ass so-called offensive genius from Texas Tech) could come in there to win 2 games a year...but Haslett will stay in STL for the time being.

The fans are already calling for Haslett's head.  I think Tommy lives here.  ;D  The Rams will be sold and moved back to LA anyway.  Good riddance.  We can have our sports bars back then.

According to news rumors, you might be on the money with this one.  However, remember Marty Schottenheimer took the Browns to the AFC title game three times..... all against Denver and all losses.

Denver beats everyone, so that's not a surprise.

If you're Detroit, nothing ensures bottom of the barrel status like the hiring of retread Dennis Green.  Won next to nothing in Minnesota, won nothing in Arizona.

It sounds like a bad Three Dog Night cover band.

The press conferences might be a little funnier but that's about it.

He did take the Vikes to two NFC Titles, which is more than we can say for the Lions.  Last time they made it that far was 1991. 

Two-thirds of the NFL's minority head coaches might lose their jobs?  I wonder if Jesse and/or Al will rise up against this discrimination.

Wow - and Three Dog Night sucks too...good visual Big Daddy

I'm adding four more to this list after today's losses:


New York Jets- Eric Mangini - Mike Homlgren

The Jets were sitting pretty atop the AFC East and humiliated the Titans in week 12.  They then proceeded to lose four of their last five games, and barely hang on against Buffalo.  Favre suddenly went interception crazy and started clashing with teammates who he thought "didn't care about winning" and his receivers began bitching about how hard he throws the ball.  Holmgren is saying he doesn't want to coach anymore, but being reunited with his old QB can easily change that.  That is, if Favre decides to stay one more year.  If Favre retires, do you tear this team down and rebuild completely?



Denver- Mike Shannahan - Steve Spagnulio

Shannahan's Donkos were alone in first place all season long, and they lost it on the last week to a team that was sitting at 4-8 four weeks ago.  They score constantly, but can't stop anyone else from scoring.  It's safe to say that Shannahan has worn out his welcome in Denver.   Spagnulio built the Giants defense into what it is today, including a shutdown of the Patriots vaunted offense in Super Bowl XLII. 



Dallas - Wade Phillips - Jason Garrett

Dallas, with all their weapons on offense and playmakers on defense, was a trendy Super Bowl pick by the preseason media outlets.  What do they do?  Go 9-7 and miss the playoffs.  Tony Romo gets hurt and proves again he can't handle the pressure of a big game, Pac Man gets suspended again, players fight with each other, and T.O. is.... well, T.O. 



Tampa Bay - Jon Gruden - Mike Nolan

Tampa just completed a big collapse that can rival the '93 Dolphins.  9-3 and leading the division.  They proceed to lose their last four and miss the playoffs.  Gruden has clashed with his players and ownership.  It's time for a nasty divorce.  I'm going out on a limb here, because Nolan just got fired from San Francisco.  But he did show some promise there, before the Niners notoriously cheap ownership overcame his ability.  Plus, he had no QB all that time (Alex Smith is not an NFL caliber QB).  He had Frank Gore and used him well.  In Tampa, he's got his West Coast QB in Jeff Garcia, and a good stable of RB's led by Earnest Graham and Warrick Dunn. 

I just realized, that if both Jtex's prediction and mine come true, there will have been 11 coaches fired this offseason.  That's almost half the friggin teams in the NFL.  That's a LOT of new head coaches next year.

Not sure if we should start a new thread on all the moves that happen or if we should just pile on here...

Anyway, the Browns have officially fired their GM, Phil Savage. Crennel will reportedly be gone within 48 hours, although I'm not sure why the rush to fire the coach before you have a new GM in place.

ESPN is reporting that Scott Pioli (Patriots VP of Personnel and Bill Parcels' son-in-law) is first in line to succeed Savage.

Let's keep it here. 

Phil Savage was a good talent evaluator who had a good reputation.  The Browns had some talented players who clearly underachieved this year.  That's not the GM's fault, it's the coach's. 

Rod Marinelli is officially fired from the Lions (http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=3797433)

Sources say Crennel will be fired from the Browns after the GM axing (http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=3795786)

And here's a shocker, and perhaps a reason to change the thread title: Mangina to be fired from the Jets (http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=3797442)!  What's the money on him going to the Lions?

Not a shocker at all.  Jets owner Woody Johnson ripped the team in the press conference, calling them underachievers and stuff.  When was the last time you saw an owner do that? 

UPDATE:   The New York Daily News is reporting that Woody Johnson will hold a press conference at 10 am at the team's practice facility.  It's safe to say ManGINA is gone. 


http://www.nydailynews.com/blogs/jets/2008/12/it-could-be-monday-mourning-fo.html

What would be worse for Mangina?  Getting blackballed from the NFL, or being hired by the Lions?

The Dallas Morning News is reporting that Wade Phillips job is safe for now. 

The New York Daily news is reporting that Eric Mangini has been fired as Jets coach.  GM Mike Tannenbaum's job appears to be safe for now, as he was at that press conference.

The Jets' owner probably figures Brett Faver Media Whore will return for another season if Mangina isn't around to hold him accountable for all the stupid shit he does on the field.

I was watching ESPN at my local sub shop, and a few Jets players who choose to remain anonymous are saying they're pissed with the way the coaching staff caters to Favre.  That team is built to run the ball, and they kept on throwing it.  If Favre comes back, this team will be in disarray for another year.

So far, Jtex is 3 for 7 on predictions of fired coaches, and I am 1 for 4. 

The Tampa Tribune is reporting that the Glazer brothers (Bucs owners) will meet for dinner sometime later this week to discuss Jon Gruden's future. 

Wrong.  ESPN is reporting the following:

The Rams have told Jim Hasslett he will not be retained as head coach.  They have contacted Green Bay assistant coach (and former Miami Hurricane) Winston Moss for consideration for their head coaching vacancy.

Bills owner Ralph Wilson will meet with top team officials tomorrow to decide the fate of coach Dick Jauron. 

Additionally, if the Browns make Scott Pioli the GM, he may consider re-hiring Romeo Crennell.... as defensive coordinator.  A pretty bold move IMO. 

Anything can happen, but I have a hunch Jauron will be retained.  Too many vacancies right now.  I imagine Jauron would be one of the ones that would fill a current head coaching vacancy, as opposed to the Rod Marinellis of the world.

The Rocky Mountain News (Denver) is reporting that the Browns are going to interview Eric Mangini before the week is out.  If this happens, I can see him having Romeo Crennel as his D Coordinator. 

Additionally, the 49ers have fired offensive coordinator Mike Martz.

Lil B says he has a news source that the Donkos fired Mike Shannahan.  That makes me 2 for 4 and Jtex 3 for 7. 

My 7 year old also makes everything a competition.  Just saying.

Jtex and I are not competing, I'm just keeping a tally of what we got right and wrong.  He predicted that seven shit teams would change head coaches.  After witnessing some serious choke jobs on Sunday, I added four more choke teams. 

So far, we both look to be on the money. 

The Bills have decided to retain coach Dick Jauron. 

NFL.com is reporting that the Jets are going to interview Marty Schottenheimer.  If he gets the job, wouldn't he have to put some one as an "assistant head coach" in order to follow the nepotism law?

Rumor has it the Browns are going to hire Mangini.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090107/ap_on_sp_fo_ne/fbn_browns_mangini_3
AP source: Browns to hire Eric Mangini as coach
 
By TOM WITHERS, AP Sports Writer Tom Withers, Ap Sports Writer – 51 mins ago AP CLEVELAND – The Cleveland Browns will hire Eric Mangini as their next head coach, a person with knowledge of the negotiations told The Associated Press. Mangini, fired last week by the New York Jets, will be introduced at a Thursday news conference at the team's headquarters in Berea, said the person, who spoke on condition of anonymity because Mangini's contract has not been finalized. Mangini reached an agreement with the club Wednesday, the person said.

Mangini is represented by agent Ron Shapiro, who is Mangini's father-in-law.

The 37-year-old Mangini began his NFL career as a ballboy with the Browns in 1994 under then-coach Bill Belichick.

Mangini went 23-25 and made the playoffs once in three seasons with the Jets, who stumbled down the stretch to lose four of their last five and miss the playoffs after an 8-3 start.

The Browns fired Romeo Crennel after the team went 4-12 this season.

Mangini was one of four candidates interviewed by Browns owner Randy Lerner, but the only one with NFL head coaching experience — a prerequisite for Lerner, who also spoke with New York Giants defensive coordinator Steve Spagnuolo, New England offensive coordinator Josh McDaniels and Browns defensive coordinator Mel Tucker.

Mangini was fired by the Jets one day after the club finished a disastrous stretch where they lost to Denver, San Francisco and Seattle — three non-playoff teams — in the final month behind 39-year-old quarterback Brett Favre's failing arm and questionable play calling by Mangini.

Lerner fired Crennel the same morning Mangini was let go but he was unaware Mangini, who will be 38 on Jan. 19, was available when he met with reporters. Lerner, who has also been interviewing general manager candidates, wasted no time in going after Mangini and interviewed him the following night in the New York area.

Lerner was enamored with Mangini's potential and believed he would bring discipline to the underachieving Browns. During his interview, Mangini identified Baltimore player personnel director George Kokinis as his preference as GM.

Kokinis is expected to interview with Lerner on Sunday.

After Mangini inherited a 4-12 team and led the Jets to 10 wins in his first season, New York's tabloids dubbed him "Mangenius." But by the end of his tenure in the NFL's largest market, he was being called moody, dour and controlling and he took the fall for the team's stunning collapse.

The Jets spent more than $140 million in offseason additions and traded for Favre, a move Mangini didn't favor but was forced to accept.

Well we know where Scott Poili is NOT gonna go :)

It's official: Mangina has been hired by the Browns.

Aww, I was hoping he'd be stuck in Detroit.  >:D

So far, I'm 3 of 4 on my predictions, and Jtex is 3 of 7 on his, with a possible fourth depending on Scott Pioli's decision in KC.

Steve Spagnuolo to the Rams

http://www.rotoworld.com/content/playerpages/player_main.aspx?sport=NFL&id=413

Damn, the Giants coaching staff is getting gutted.

Not surprising.  That defense was shit this year.  

I can see a pattern emerging here....  EVERYONE is looking at Baltimore, Atlanta, and Miami.  They took younger assistant coaches with little or no head coaching experience, and totally turned it around in one year.  Other teams I'm guessing will be trying the same thing this offseason.  Whether or not it'll work for them remains to be seen.

Who else did they lose this year?

^^^

http://www.thedolphinsmakemecry.com/forums/index.php?topic=13671.0

^^^ the ASSISTANT offensive line coach!  Oh my god! How can go on without their assistant offensive line coach?

And with Herm Edwards getting the ax, Jtex is now 4 of 7 on his predictions.  I'm 3 of 4, with almost no chance of being correct on the 4th.  Not too shabby for both of us.