The Dolphins Make Me Cry.com - Forums

(For Some of us those are the scariest words that will be ever muttered to us.....)

Lately We've had a bit of a Baby boom around the office,One of the women who works here suspects she might be pregnant (it's also the latest office Gossip). One of my Bosses came in yesterday and told me his wife is pregnant..(He reminds me alot of Mainedolfan, a compliment to both) He was driving home Friday night,after dinner out with his wife,and they were chit chatting about a night they had about a month ago....Do you remember that little romantic weekend we had,where I.....He said he was thinking...Hmm she's in the mood,I'm getting lucky tonight....She went on about details of that night...They pull in the garage..He said he's all revved up to take her into the house...and she says you'll be paying for that night the rest of your life.....He said,I went from horny,to sheer joy.....He has a son already,but mentioned His timing couldn't have been worse,he was just getting ready to start law school,they hadn't been married long,and he couldn't be there much for his wife.He said he was really going to enjoy this time.....

One of the researchers came in this morning and said,My girlfriends pregnant....So everyone was asking..How'd she tell you,Are you happy sad? what? He said they were sitting on the couch,she said she had to pee....about 10 minutes later she walked back in the room,and said Just as I suspected,You're gonna be a father...Then she went in the kitchen and raided the icebox.....

I'm 33,and have 2 women tell me they were pregnant,Both times I had massive chest pains....Niether time was pleasurable at all....1 was a scare,one wasn't mine.....

So Some of you are fathers,some of you ladies have kids.....How did the news get told to you,or how did you tell the other person?

We tried for a very long time so I was kind of there when she found out.

Both times my wife made me my favorite eggplant parm dinner. Afterwards  cheesecake followed by a big Hug and a whisper in my ear........

I'm always leary now when I smell eggplant......... ::)

I have talked about this up here before, but think this is the first time that a thread came up specifically on the topic...

I've gotten the "I'm pregnant" line from five different women in my life, but in all five cases, the pregnancy was aborted. I'm relatively sure that if I'd stuck around Germany any longer after my second tour, I'd have gotten that line a lot more times, as I screwed my way through Europe in the 80's with little to no protection.  Of the five who got pregnant by me and brought it to my attention, 3 of them were on the pill. My tadpoles are resolute little swimmers...

The first couple of times I heard it, I thought I was having a massive coronary. The rest, well...I was a little more relaxed about it.

I thought the way my sister told my brother-in-law was kinda cute. 

She wrapped up a box of newborn diapers in very fancy wrapping paper and gave it to him as a gift. 
 

My wife and I had been trying forever.  She peed on a stick around 5am while I was sleeping and came into the room sobbing next to the bed.  I woke up thinking it was another negative and - she shows me the stick.

Positive! 

One of the best days of my life.

I had 1 false alarm when I was 19 she was 18.  That was a scary freaking few days!

After that it was either condom or aim for the Belly button.  I didn't have my first Son until I was 33. Second one at 37.  No more.  As soon as I get up the nerve I'm gonna have the Boys cut.......... :'(

What is that show where the guy has it snipped...and then his wife makes him get it reversed...and then snipped again...but it didn't work???

I THINK it was Californication but I'm not sure.

Holy crap, no thanks.  I'll bag it until I'm 70 before I let anyone go down there and nip tuck!

I never had a false alarm.  Triple protection works well.  We were actually trying when we got pregnant so we were very happy when the little line on the pee stick changed color.

This sounds incredibly frightening! Lots of scary things floating around in the 80s!!

I hate Condoms.  Thats one of the joys of being married. Letting her rip whenever the mood strikes. Condoms KILL the buzz for me.  But Stomach and ass painting is getting old.........from what I hear it only takes moments , a bag of frozen veggies for a night or 2 and then its seed spreading time!   This summer I think I might just go for it.  I'm getting a tattoo in August (Mid life thing) I could make it a fun filled day!

I'm sure it's not that bad - but man, the thought of it?  Same reason I won't get laser surgery on my eyes.  I'm sure it's not bad at all - but the CHANCE they screw up and I'm blind scares the garbage out of me.

And this would be my BALLS that we're talking about.  What if the doctor had too much coffee that morning?  Nooooooooooooo thanks!

I'm 36 and only had a scare once. I have considered getting nipped because at this point most women in my dating range already have children or don't want them. I do still have the ability for 20 somethings without kids though so that has helped me not to do it. I don't think I want kids, but I haven't met a woman who really wants them with me either. You never know what the future brings when you are single though.

I've had laser surgery as well. The Idea suuuucked. And usually at the dentist or when your getting stiches or anything unpleasant you just look away until its over. With the lasik you have to stare directly ahead. but that too was over in moments. Highly reccomend it.  ;)

I have 2. If you have not yet and are even thinking about having children I wouldn't do it Bro. I met you and think you would probably make a really good dad one day.

My brother is 36 and his first born is due in about 3 weeks. His wife has 2 girls from her first marriage - oldest is a senior in HS, younger is a sophomore

I hear that a lot, but being the pessimist I am not so sure. One thing is for sure, if I do face fatherhood I will be the best one I can be.

I've often wondered why those who didn't/don't want kids would EVER take the chance at no protection, ESPECIALLY if you're the woman.

If the roles were reversed and some dude told me, "I don't like condoms/buzz kill",  I'd be like: (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v693/lordthundergod/Funny%20shh/4zeluu0.gif)

I have never taken that chance, and have never had that scare of my womens giving me that little talk. I don't trust "the pill" by itself. Seen too many accidents to scare my ass into wrapping it.

I feel no pity for those who end up crying over their "mistake" that one night. Well what the F did you think was gonna happen? It's called the process of procreating, and you took every step necessary for it to happen. 

Now, protection that FAILS. Yeah, that sucks. Abortion is the last step, and you better pray to your [insert god here] the woman wants it too.

We were trying to get pregnant (didn't take long at all. my boys are strong). The wife went to the clinic at lunch to be sure and stopped by my office on the way back. It was nearly impossible for me to keep my mind on work for the rest of the day.

HA!